Who's In It: Dong-gun Jang, Kate Bosworth, Geoffrey Rush, Danny Huston, Tony Cox, Lung Ti
The Basics: A lone master swordsman (Korean superstar Dong-gun Jang, not talking much) on a mission of baby-protection in the wild wild West (he had to get far away, see, because he betrayed his own people to spare the life of the child) settles in a ghost town full of circus folk and hooks up with Kate Bosworth. But trouble finds you when you're a lone warrior, so he winds up having to battle... well, everyone. It's stupid, by the way. But...
What's The Deal: It's stupid in a way you won't really hate, provided you're already in the mood for a terrible rehash of cliches from a hundred other martial arts movies and Westerns, as well as cliches from every earlier mashup of those two genres. It's as though writer-director Sngmoo Lee went into this knowing full well he was creating a cheap piece of junk and was possibly even amused by the idea that it didn't go straight to DVD. But he's committed to keeping a straight face while he hands you the mud pie, like a six-year-old kid saying, "Go on! Eat it! I made this just for you!"
Also? It's Got More Clowns And Ninjas Than A Gathering Of The Juggalos: Flying battle-ninjas and cowboys and clowns and exploding Ferris wheels and Geoffrey Rush as a sniper and little person Tony Cox. All of them. At the same time. Fighting. There are also fish used to stab people and some severed heads. Of course the best part of this equation is Geoffrey Rush. I know he didn't plan it this way, since actors don't decide release schedules, but you can almost feel him gloating over reaching two absolutely non-overlapping demographics with this and the Oscar-y The King's Speech.
What Keeps It From Actual Greatness. Besides The Fact That It Sucks: The action seems like it was created in post-production. In a martial arts movie, even a crappy one, the biggest thrill is watching the kicks and punches land and the acrobatics feel like they're being performed by acrobats (aka Jackie Chan, Tony Jaa, etc). This movie isn't in that league. So if you're looking for real kung fu, look somewhere else.
One More Thing: What's with the generic title? YOU HAVE CLOWNS AND NINJAS IN YOUR MOVIE, DUDE. Don't hide your light under a bushel.