Who's in It:
Jennifer Aniston, Kevin Costner, Mark Ruffalo, Shirley MacLaine, Mena Suvari
The Basics: Aniston plays a woman who can't make life decisions, such as whether or not to marry her boyfriend, because she "doesn't know who she really is." And here's why: Her family likes to play tennis. But she doesn't. Can you even believe the identity trauma she must be going through? Then she learns that her family is also the basis for The Graduate, which she finds thoroughly upsetting. In real life, you'd just be laughing about how your grandmother was a slut back in the day.
What's the Deal? What incriminating donkey photographs of Hollywood power players must Rob Reiner own to be allowed to make a movie about nothing, the least funny movie of 2005 — and I haven't forgotten about Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo either — and get a big Christmas Day release for it? You wonder whether anyone watched the dailies. And if they did, did they cringe silently or did they all just slap him on the back and say, "Yeah, Rob! You're on top of your game! It's better than When Harry Met Sally
A Seemingly Inexhaustible Supply of Nerve: The characters here like to talk about movies, namedropping their favorites and complaining about how films are nothing but special effects now and no longer about real people. Then they chat about really important country-club issues that affect the lives of us all.
Friends Don't Let Friends Take Roles in Movies Like This: Hey, Courteney Cox, your buddy here needs you to intervene in her script choices. Don't act like you're too busy. This is important. J.A. can be funny when there's something funny in the script, but this is just 100 minutes of confused whining. It was nice of you to be there for her when Brad left, but if you're really a part of Team Aniston, you gotta attend to all the fires that need putting out, OK?
Who Survives Unscathed, but Just Barely: MacLaine, in the geriatric Mrs. Robinson role. She's boozy and mean and funny when she's allowed to be. So that's a good solid 10 minutes of screen time.