Dave's Rating:

2.0

Paranormal Hacktivity

Who's In It: George Clooney, Ewan McGregor, Jeff Bridges, Kevin Spacey, Stephen Lang, Robert Patrick

The Basics: Ewan McGregor is a reporter who thinks he's got a great story on his hands when he hooks up with Clooney, a former military specialist whose job involved winning battles with mind control powers. But then it turns out that Clooney (who could actually stare at a goat and kill it that way, with nothing more than his own super invisible brainwaves, hence the title) might be crazy and/or leading the journalist on a trip to nowhere based on a "vision." In that same way, this movie turns out to be just like its plot.

What's The Deal: It would have been a whole lot cooler if they'd hired somebody supernatural like Walter Mercado or that Dog Whisperer guy to come in and stare this movie into being good. Get the Amazing Kreskin in there to make it funnier, sharper, stronger and more focused. Because now that Bush isn't in office the satire feels less enraged, the funny stuff seems aimed at whoever happens to be in the way and the entire movie feels like something the Coen brothers felt wasn't mean enough for them to bother with.

Who's Still Cool: Clooney. He's one of those guys who can just sail through almost anything, even when it's not doing him any favors to be a part of it. This comes from trial by fire of course. After you've worn a fluffy mullet on national TV and sung "You Wear It Well" with El DeBarge surrounded by the Facts of Life girls, your soul turns to Adamantium and you're indestructible.

How Many Strikes Ewan McGregor Has Left This Year: After Amelia, exactly 1. He's saddled with one of those weird fake flat American accents for no good reason and they keep making him say "Jedi" over and over. No, seriously, they really do. It's like the movie is relying on him to sledgehammer home the one big in-joke until you scream "uncle!" Luckily, even though Angels and Demons was crap too, in that one he got to sky dive from a helicopter in a priest outfit. Every little thing counts.

Based On: The non-fiction book of the same name, which includes much more damning information about how crazy American military policy and practice can be. So get yourself to the library instead of the multiplex.

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