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Violence: Tons of hyper-intense, hyper-stylized violence that pushs the envelope on splatter and gore. The hero kills many, many opponents, with few repercussions. Americans shoot Mexican innocents in cold blood at the border, including a pregnant girl. Viewers see severed heads, severed limbs, and punctured eyes. The hero uses a human intestine as a rope. A priest is crucified. Objects such as corkscrews, meat thermometers, weed whackers, broken glass, and high-heeled shoes are used as weapons, as well as lots and lots of big guns and knives. Cars are smashed up.
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Sex: The main character sleeps with -- or almost sleeps with -- at least four different women. Machete rescues a naked girl in the opening scene; her breasts and bottom are visible. She conceals a phone in her vagina (she retrieves it offscreen). Two sexy nurses care for Machete in a hospital. He kisses girls in bed on two separate occasions and makes out with two naked women at once in a swimming pool. Jessica Alba is seen naked in the shower (side view). Michelle Rodriguez wears a sexy outfit -- leather bra, bare midriff, and leather pants. One adult male confesses to "impure thoughts" about his pretty daughter. Also sexual innuendo and sexual suggestion.
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Language: Non-stop strong language, starting with multiple uses of "f--k" and "s--t" (in various forms). Also "son of a bitch," "c--ksucker," "pecker," "balls," "p---y," "whore," "nuts," "damn," "goddamn," "Jesus Christ" (as an exclamation), "hell," and "a--hole," plus Spanish curses like "cabrón" and "pendejo."
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Consumerism: Not an issue
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Drinking, drugs and smoking: Characters smoke cigarettes and drink tequila. One character takes some kind of pills with booze. Lindsay Lohan plays a drug addict who also smokes cigarettes (she's discovered passed out at a "crack house," but viewers never see her taking any drugs).