Grae's Rating:

2.0

Premature Documentation

Whoz Innit: Justin Bieber, Usher Raymond, Jaden Smith, Miley Cyrus, Ludacris, Sean Kingston, LA Reid

Tha Basicz: This is a concert documentary following Justin Bieber on his 2010 tour, which included a sold out date at Madison Square Garden. It comes complete with factoids about his life and rise to superstardom, as well as plenty of screaming girls, purple clothing, and Miley Cyrus in a short dress. The film is basically the moving embodiment of Tiger Beat magazine.

Whutz the Deel: As far as concert docs go, this one doesn't offer any variation from the formula and will satisfy fans. For everyone else, there is very little compelling story to sink your teeth into. The kid has only been alive 16 years, and a star for about 1 of those years, so this documentary offers a proportionate amount of information--he has a good voice, he's left handed, he uploaded some videos to youtube, he sold out the Garden, end scene. Most of the documentary seems like a stretch for time, including some tension about his vocal chords being stressed out. Guess what other time I saw that? Truth or Dare. Guess which movie delighted me more at the prospect of the stressed vocal chords being a result of some sort of sexual escapade? Also Truth or Dare. In this movie, there's just an abundance of Tweeting about how he didn't want to "disappoint u" and that he's sorry :(. No Warren Beatty cameos here.

ZOMG: The best part of the movie is the fans. I could watch girls with crazy eyes squeal and demand to be his first wife all day long. I chortled with delight thinking about how Selena Gomez better stay out of dark alleys, because those girls will not hesitate to rip her apart like Pinhead in Hellraiser. And as a bonus, the film can be used as evidence down the road when one of the interviewees snaps and starts slashing Beeb's hoodies while he sleeps.

IMHO: Best part of the movie: Justin Bieber slow-mo hair shake in 3D. Thanks, Jon Chu! The rest of the 3D is pointless, but this is art.

TTYL: I was genuinely surprised to see how talented this kid is with instruments--I already knew he has pipes. Currently I am disinterested in his music, but once he ages and is forced to start expanding on his talents, I think we might see something interesting (Justin Timberlake, anyone?). I am excited for the day that he goes REALLY unplugged and puts his most powerful, raw ability on display. In the meantime, I'm just : /

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Comments (8)

Reid - 2-12-2011 4:09 AM
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LA Reid shares my surname, WHY MUST HE PARTAKE IN SUCH MONSTROSITY!

sara - 2-12-2011 12:03 PM
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I just got home from seeing the movie and I thought it was REALLY good so if you think it's not good then you're crazy!

Tina Murray - 2-12-2011 7:14 PM
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Premature Documentation....you are funny!! That deserves an award!!!

Adam Cleary - 2-13-2011 1:55 AM
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I haven't seen this movie, nor will i ever see it. But in my opinion all this is, is a tabloid for him to become more rich and successful then he already is. Don't get me wrong he has some talent and he is deffinitly going places. But come on, he has yet to live a life that deserves a documentary.

MB - 2-18-2011 7:39 AM
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Kudos for the text shorthand paragraph titles in your review. Makes it all the more hilariously tween-ish...like the movie.

Ace - 2-22-2011 5:53 PM
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took my daughter to see it. Dumbest movie I ever seen. on par with a low budget 70's horror flick!

Witney - 2-23-2011 7:17 PM
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An actual quote from Justin Bieber to, of all people, John Waters: "Your 'stache is the jam!"

danielle - 4-04-2011 1:36 PM
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i luved it. it was so inspirational. i just luv his story, i look up to him. the movie did good but it wasn't the #1 movie. i luv the song too...good job. i always have the bieber fever

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