Who's in It:
The voices of Ray Romano, John Leguizamo, Denis Leary, Seann William Scott, Queen Latifah, Will Arnett, Jay Leno
The Basics: Boring stuff about finding a home and facing your fears and learning to love and then YEAH, IT'S THAT SQUIRREL TRYING TO GET THE NUT! And then more boring stuff, blah, blah, blah, and then MORE SQUIRREL! WOO-HOO! And then finally a lot more boring stuff until SQUIRREL'S BACK WITH MORE NUT-CHASING!
What's the Deal? No more bad, dull sequels to animated features that were no good the first time around. That's it. I decree it so. If you want to milk some more cash out of the franchise, just keep making the toys and pump out some cheapo, straight-to-DVD crud like all the Bambi 2 rip-offs and Beauty and the Beast: Belle's Tea Party or whatever it is. Lilo & Stitch 8. Just send it directly to its uncritical target demo and leave me out of it. Seriously.
What's Good About This Mess: The squirrel. Give that animal his own feature. Why not? No big-name voice actors to pay, just silent scampering antics. I might be lured into a theater for that.
Yeah, That Sort of Thing Won't Age Badly at All: You know what's great? Inane pop-culture references in kids' movies. Let's put one in there from Jerry Maguire! That'll be hilarious! "You complete me"! I'm cracking up! Oh, yeah, and you know what else? One of the animals should sing R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly" while he's flying! Get it?!
Hey, Hollywood, Shut Up: There's a scene in which the animals act as though they're all film executives giving a screenwriter meddlesome suggestions in a meeting. Because that's such a universal experience.