Who's in It:
Amber Tamblyn, Edison Chen, Arielle Kebbel, Jennifer Beals, Teresa Palmer, Misako Uno, Sarah Roemer, Sarah Michelle Gellar
The Basics: Sequel time, suckers. Pay good money to see more creepy (and oh, yes, also boring) ghosts that can't be killed, curses that can't be broken and human characters you can't muster any concern for. Let 'em all die. Let 'em get grudged. Who cares?
What's the Deal? OK, first of all, that stupid grudge house from the first creepy, not scary and boring movie is still standing, even after Gellar torched it. Don't they have space issues in Tokyo? Wouldn't someone have razed that dang thing by now? Second, Tamblyn is Joan of Arcadia and knows better than to go poking around in the supernatural. So when she does, you're like, "Well, you brought that on yourself." There are other plot lines about some Catholic schoolgirls and Beals getting themselves grudged. And none of it is scary. Not once.
What's Good: The opening scene, in which Beals pours hot bacon grease on her husband's head and then bludgeons him with the pan. Then she sits down to have some bacon. My favorite horror movie death of the year.
How Many Minutes of Screen Time Does Sarah Michelle Gellar Get? About three, total. Then they throw her off a roof. Or maybe she dives to make sure she never has to be in another sequel.
And Another Thing: These dumb people just stand there when the ghosts pop up and grab their legs. Run! Shake it loose! And if they're rising slowly out of a bucket of water or something, then you really have time to scram. If you can't get away from the slowest ghosts in Japan, then you deserve whatever you've got coming.