Dave White
First Snow Review

Dave's Rating:

2.0

… a dull, dour version of My Name Is Earl.

Who's In It: Guy Pearce, Piper Perabo, J.K. Simmons

The Basics: Why, oh why, can't Guy Pearce learn to live in the moment? And it's not like he couldn't do it if he tried. Any yoga instructor can give you the basics on that sort of thing. In Memento he has to unravel the past, and now in this movie he has to dance around the landmines of the future, specifically whichever one will kill him — the fortune teller said so! — when the first snow falls.

What's The Deal? This movie is kind of lazy. Actually, make that more than kind of. You know Guy Pearce's character is a jerk because he yammers into a cell phone all the time and because his girlfriend (Piper Perabo) is upset at him. And you know you're in New Mexico because of the tumbleweeds and the strummy guitars playing on the score. And Pearce is good at what he does, but all he has to do is wander around this movie noticing the fortune teller's predictions coming true and trying to figure out how he's going to bite it. It's like the filmmakers decided to go for shorthand gestures, right down to the doomed man's attempt at redemption, turning it into a dull, dour version of My Name Is Earl.

Why You Should Never Put Piper Perabo In a Movie Like This: Because every time you see her onscreen being "The Girlfriend" and getting nothing to do, it reminds you that you'd much rather be watching Coyote Ugly.

Who Should See It: Guy Pearce completists (they do exist; I know a couple) and fans of pretty Southwestern vistas (the production design and the cinematography make it good-looking even after you've stopped caring about the characters, and that's pretty early on in the movie).

Life Lessons It Offers: There is no forgiveness. Also that if you're a bad person, then there's no point in trying to make things right, because you're going to get it anyway. So live it up now, evildoers.

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