Dave's Rating:


… a widescreen unfunny sitcom …

Who's in It: Matthew McConaughey, Sarah Jessica Parker, Kathy Bates, Terry Bradshaw

The Basics: Parker tricks McConaughey into believing she likes him. Well, OK, actually it's McConaughey's parents (Bates and Bradshaw) who do the tricking, because they pay her to make out with him, but it's totally not like being a prostitute so don't even suggest such a thing. And then all their friends get involved in the big scheme because they're zany like that and really, who doesn't like deceiving the ones they love?

What's the Deal? You didn't really intend to stay at boring old home and watch an unfunny sitcom, did you? No, you didn't. You really meant to go out to the theater and pay 10 bucks to watch a widescreen unfunny sitcom instead. Hollywood knows exactly what you want. So here it is!

"What Sucks About This Movie," a Briefer-Than-It-Could-Be List by Dave White:
1. These bores have the nerve to make a reference to The Philadelphia Story, one of the coolest, funniest movies of all time.
2. McConaughey's character gets bitten by wild animals four times. One time they even cut back to the animal that did it, and it's laughing like suddenly the movie has turned into Babe: Pig in the City or something.
3. Wacky sushi-eating scene.
4. Wacky paintball-playing scene.
5. Wacky Bradshaw-Gets-Naked scene.
6. Doggy reaction shots.
7. It's one of those lying movies in which perfectly attractive people (Zooey Deschanel and Justin Bartha, who was the mentally handicapped kid in Gigli, FYI) are considered the ugly weirdos when, in fact, they're just as good-looking as any other person on-screen, as well as being the two most interesting peripheral characters. I kept hoping they'd put rat poison in McConaughey's and Parker's food and take over the movie.

What's Actually Funny About This Movie (Besides Deschanel): The big parent-house McConaughey lives in? The street number is 420. You just know Naked Bongo Man requested that detail change on purpose.


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