Who's in It:
Alyson Hannigan, Adam Campbell, Jennifer Coolidge
The Basics: It's a Scary Movie-ish parody of romantic comedies. And it's the worst movie of 2006. And yes, it's only February, but there won't be a barfier movie than this for the next 10 months. If there is, it will probably actually kill the people who see it. Having Oprah scold you while a dentist performs a root canal on you with no Novocain on live national television would be more fun than sitting through this.
What's the Deal? They didn't screen it for the press, so I went to my local multiplex this morning at 10:30 a.m. to catch it. They showed some fun ads before the movie started. That Coke ad about the guy with the time-travel machine? I like that one. Then there were some great trailers. I really think V for Vendetta the one in which Natalie Portman plays Sinéad O' Connor looks as though it'll be kind of awesome. And then Date Movie unspooled for 80 minutes, vomiting up serious buckets of Unfunny, hating my eyes and trying to make them blind.
Why Alyson Hannigan Agreed to Be in This Some Theories:
1. She is the victim of blackmail.
2. Her agent played a trick on her.
3. She consults the Magic 8-Ball to choose scripts.
One Take-Back; OK, Two Take-Backs: I will admit to chuckling at the part in which the cat has sex with the corpse. And also at the part in which Eddie Griffin coughs up a hairball that he gets while licking Fred Willard's chest.
Pointless Cameo(s): Lil Jon shows up to say "Crunk." At least it looked like Lil Jon. And then a Kevin Federline impersonator pops in, too. Or maybe it was the real Federline.