Jen's Rating:

1.0

Parents beware!

Who's In It: The voices of Hayden Panettiere, Justin Long, Christina Ricci, Dennis Hopper, Danny Glover, Larry Miller, Eric Price, Vicky Lewis, Chris Carmack

The Basics: Kate (Hayden Panettiere) is the next Alpha in line to lead her wolf pack, trained to be strong and independent and set to become the mate of the preening Alpha son of a rival pack. Humphrey (Justin Long) is a goofy Omega who secretly pines to break pack taboo and "howl at the moon" with Kate. When Kate and Humphrey are kidnapped by humans and sent to repopulate another national forest, the odd couple team up to get back home in time to stop a wolfy war, falling in love along the way.

What's The Deal: This animated adventure is a lot of clichés all wrapped into one movie: a fish-out-of-water tale, an opposites-attract story, and road trip romance starring talking, singing, anthropomorphic wolves with names like Kate and Humphrey and Winston. Unfortunately, what Alpha and Omega is not is good. Or watchable. Or the opposite of tedious. With its rudimentary designs and cartoonish look, it feels like a step backward, especially when you consider the breathtaking cinematic achievements of recent animated films (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, How to Train Your Dragon, Toy Story 3) that not only push the visual envelope but do so with a sophisticated ear for storytelling. Ultimately, it comes down to this: In the screening I attended more than one child walked out, even more bored then I was, complaining loudly to their parent. And if kids don't even think Alpha and Omega is worth their time, why should adults?

Another Reason To Think Twice About Alpha and Omega: Little ones may have a LOT of questions on the ride home about Alpha and Omega's peculiar PG-rated themes. Questions like, "Mommy, what's 'mating' mean?" It's a cartoon movie in which lady wolves have eyelashes and wolves flirt with each other and pair off to howl at the moon with members of the opposite sex at the lycan equivalent of Lover's Lane. A kid-targeted adventure in which headstrong females are set up in arranged marriages unless they have the courage to go against the grain and "howl" with their lower-caste suitors. Alpha and Omega's socio-sexual themes leave more of a lingering impression than anything else, like a bizarrely neutered sex ed course for the under-10 set.

How's The 3-D? Occasionally fun in that gimmicky way, as when the clownish Omega wolves bobsled down mountains in hollowed tree trunks or when a colorful golfing goose tees off across the pretty woodsy landscapes. For the most part, unfortunately, the 3-D adds nothing more than a few dollars to the price of admission.

If You Must Watch An Animated Children's Movie About Talking Animals, Wait For: Next week's The Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole, directed by Zack Snyder (300, Watchmen). It's got impressive 3-D CGI animation and cute animal protagonists and the only grown-up concepts you'll have to explain to the kids are death, war, and betrayal. Fun times!

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Comments (9)

ari - 9-21-2010 11:33 AM
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if you saw the legend of the guardians already, why isn't there a review!! I want, I want!

Mark - 9-21-2010 4:22 PM
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this movie looks awful but owls of gahoole looks just as bad :/

teapar - 9-22-2010 2:37 PM
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"only grown-up concepts you'll have to explain to the kids are death, war, and betrayal. Fun times!" Really? You're more worried about explaining to your kids about Love, but its okay for them to watch death, war and betrayal... what god ass backwords world to you live in.

teapar - 9-22-2010 2:37 PM
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"only grown-up concepts you'll have to explain to the kids are death, war, and betrayal. Fun times!" Really? You're more worried about explaining to your kids about Love, but its okay for them to watch death, war and betrayal... what god ass backwords world to you live in.

owl - 9-24-2010 8:53 PM
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teabag does not understand the concept of sarcasm

tom - 10-03-2010 6:01 PM
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I am 65 years old and I did not see any sexual things in the movie. wolves howl at the moon together. That doesn't mean their having sex. What 10 or under would even think that. Your the sick one for even suggesting it. If your going to review movies about animals you should investigate their habits. No more reading your reviews. Hope movies.com fire you.

Natalie - 10-16-2010 1:09 PM
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This movie is a very good movie and if u don't think it's good for kids then you must be a very bad parent.

Natalie - 10-16-2010 1:14 PM
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If you don't like kids to watch this movie then you must let your younger kids watch bloody movies like The last exorcism or you let your child watch a movie like Devil. Who would let their child 10-under watch the movie Devil? This is a great movie for 10-under. 11 years old kids might not care to much for this movie but there is no reason for parents to beware you should only say that in movies that kids should not watch.

rob - 11-27-2010 3:19 PM
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jen your a retard for telling parents to be aware. u must be one hell of a parent if you dont let your kid watch this.

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