Dave White
16 Blocks Review

Dave's Rating:

3.0

… super-unlikely stuff …

Who's in It: Bruce Willis, Mos Def, David Morse

The Basics: Boozehound cop Bruce hikes 16 blocks to a court date with annoying Mos (his character's doofus voice is like nails on a chalkboard) so Mos can testify against a crew of corrupt police officers. But the bad law enforcers just want Mos dead. Bruce, too, if necessary.

What's the Deal? When an actor enjoys being a certain heroic thing on-screen, like, oh, say, a decent but flawed cop who must stand alone against overwhelming odds, it's hard for that actor to give up being heroic. It's as though they start believing they are that thing in real life. Kind of like how John Travolta thinks he's a fireman now. So here's another movie in which Willis does a bunch of super-unlikely stuff and saves the day. Whatever.

How Many Lies Does It Take to Get to the Center of Your Irritated Core? In this movie, Willis' character:
1. Drives a bus blindly and happens to crash into just the exact spot he needs to elude the bad guys.
2. Is totally liquored up but has the springy moves of a jungle cat, dodging hailstorms of gunfire.
3. Manages an utterly confusing bait-and-switch move involving a seemingly magic ambulance, also eluding the bad guys.

And some other stuff, too. But those are all the mini-spoilers you need for now.

Typecast-o-Meter: David Morse scores, like, a 99. Again, he's the bad guy. And I mean again and again and again, he's the weirdly baby-faced but aging bad guy with the freaky gray goatee that just looks like a tiny knit cap on his chin. This dude just loves to work and get paid, I guess.

Directors Whom Bruce Willis Should Court to Pull Him Out of This Rut: Some weird French ones like Claire Denis, Catherine Breillat, Michael Haneke (OK, he's Austrian, but still mostly French) and Leos Carax. They'd strip him down to the bone.

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