The summer movie season is starting to wind down. You’ve had had your girls’ bonding night with Sex and the City and you’ve been properly confused by Inception. But now it’s time…time for you and your date to hit a chick flick—like, say, Eat Pray Love! What’s that? Your date would rather see The Expendables? He doesn’t care that Julia Roberts is going on a new-age personal growth journey that is both inspiring and irresistible? Even if Oprah strongly recommended it? Well then it’s time to trick … I mean, convince him to take you to a chick movie without letting him know you’re doing it. Don’t worry--it’s not as hard as it seems.
First, you need to know what your date’s favorite movie is. We’re talking about that one film he’ll watch on a rainy day and quote from every day on after. Next, figure out how your desired chick flick is like said favorite movie and describe it to your date as such. Our cheat sheet can get you started with a few examples below. Once you get him to the theater, you might even get lucky and reach for the popcorn at the same time. Cue movie kiss!
How to make Eat Pray Love sound like The Godfather: This one is easy. The Godfather is about the mob and the mob comes from Naples, Italy where Julia Roberts goes to Eat. For all you know there could be a shootout in a restaurant, someone might leave a horse head in her bed, someone could make her an offer she can’t refuse! This could be a really intense, suspense-filled drama and it’s really important you make sure your date doesn’t miss it.
How to make any chick flick sound like The Godfather: Most chick flicks have something to do with love. You know what else has something to do with love? The Godfather. The opening scene is a wedding, for god’s sake! Another theme in The Godfather is love of the family. Again, love. So much love in The Godfather, it’s starting to sound like it’s a chick flick. With Al Pacino, even.
How to make Eat Pray Love sound like Sideways: The reason why Eat Pray Love personally resonates with so many people is because it is a story about a slightly sad middle-aged person rejected by an ex, who copes by drinking wine, eating rich food and acting irresponsibly. Sound familiar?
How to make any chick flick sound like Sideways: If Sideways is your date’s favorite movie, then you’re in luck. Miles’s personal growth over the course of the film is exactly what happens to every girl in every chick flick ever made, except for drinking out of a spittoon. Miles is basically a woman in a man’s body. One caveat: If you grab a drink after your chick flick, avoid ordering merlot.
How to make Eat Pray Love sound like Jaws: Dissatisfied with her life, Elizabeth Gilbert goes on a significant journey to do the hard work of finding out who she really is. Tired of city life, Chief Brody moves to Amity to find the quiet life. Unfortunately, the quiet life isn’t what he thought it would be, which forces him to become the person he was afraid to be in the first place. Wow, when you think of that way, it basically is Eat Pray Love.
How to make any chick flick sound like Jaws: Chick flicks often revolve around the journey to find your soul mate… which basically involves throwing yourself in shark-infested waters in the hopes of finding the one nice fish out there. Unfortunately, before you find the one of your dreams, you often get attacked by a lot of sharks. In fact, Jaws is probably where the saying “there are plenty fish in the sea” came from.
How to make Eat Pray Love sound like Caddyshack: In Eat Pray Love, Julia Roberts goes on a journey to find herself and figure out what she wants in life. This also can be said for Danny in Caddyshack who is working at the ritzy country club to make money for college. Now, what happens to Julia Roberts might not be as funny as what happens to Danny, but one has to go to the movie before you know that and at that point your date has already parked, bought the ticket and started chowing down on his Whoppers. He’s not leaving.
How to make any chick flick sound like Caddyshack: In every romantic comedy, the girl wants one and only one thing: to get the guy. Much like how in Caddyshack, Carl wants one thing: to get rid of that pesky gopher. Both the girl and Carl go to great lengths and ridiculous attempts to achieve their goal throughout their respective films. They both even wear specific outfits to accomplish their task: hers is slutty, his is ambush-chic. In the end they win! Well, sort of.
How to make Eat Pray Love sound like Batman Begins: Much like Elizabeth Gilbert traveling to learn spirituality in India, Bruce Wayne travels the world and ends up at a monastery high above the Himalayas. However, instead of liberating his soul, Bruce learns the various ways of the criminal underworld before himself becoming a criminal. But both movies definitely have chanting.
How to make any chick flick sound like Batman Begins: What guys love about Batman Beginsare the villains, its explosions and the psychological warfare. It’s basically Sex and the City, Love, Actually and Noting Hill all rolled up in one! If you can’t convince a guy whose favorite movie is Batman Begins to see Eat Pray Love, or any romantic comedy for that matter, you’re just not trying.