Trust me, I'd love to stop writing about Lindsay Lohan
. My brain desperately wants to drop Lindsay Lohan from its vocabulary because with all the time I've spent chewing that chick out for whatever moronic situations she's found herself in, I could've been curing world hunger or making fun of Justin Bieber
. I mean, heck -- anything is better than writing about Lindsay Lohan's latest act of stupidity, but like that nine-car pile-up on the side of the road, we can't help but slow down to see what sort of sticky situation this living car wreck has gotten herself into this time.
Failed drug test? Nope. Our partying past curfew? Not a chance. Accidentally ran over a baby monkey while looking at herself in the driver's side mirror? We wish! Yes, La Lohan is back in trouble again, but this time it's because she allegedly pulled a Winona Ryder by shoplifting some expensive necklace from jewelry story. Right now the DA is trying to decide whether to file criminal charges against Lohan, who is accused of swiping a $2500 necklace from a jewelry store in Venice, California on January 22nd.
Meanwhile, Lohan claims the necklace was loaned to her, and though she gave it to a stylist to bring back, said stylist apparently forgot to return it on time. Instead, the stylist wound up bringing it straight to the LAPD. Nice. Let's hear it for responsibility!
Obviously if Lohan is found guilty of stealing the necklace, that will be a parole violation and it will send her right back to prison ... where we won't be able to document (and criticize) her every move.
Hmmm, a Lindsay Lohan blackout? That works for me. You?