In-Box Auteurism: How to Direct That Next Movie

In-Box Auteurism: How to Direct That Next Movie

Oct 15, 2009

Directed By My Email (or, Wes Anderson is a Closet Sociopath Who Hates People)

Though The Fantastic Mr. Fox is set to arrive in theaters next month, word on the street has it that Wes Anderson’s directorial techniques were far from fantastic. According to a recent article in the LA Times, Anderson directed a large portion of the stop-motion film (based on Roald Dahl’s book) via email, sending long, thorough messages to the stop-motion team in London from a Paris apartment because, well, he just didn’t want to spend two years in London.

And while this was all well and good for Anderson (“Hey, look Mom – I can watch porn with one hand and direct a major Hollywood movie with the other!”), his director of photography was less than thrilled. Tristan Oliver told the Times, “I think he’s a little sociopathic. I think he’s a little O.C.D. Contact with people disturbs him. This way, he can spend an entire day locked inside an empty room with a computer. He’s a bit like the Wizard of Oz. Behind the curtain.” So … in other words, you wouldn’t let him babysit your kids?

Meanwhile, the film’s director of animation, Mark Gustafson, had this to add: “Honestly? Yeah. He has made our lives miserable.” Anderson, who at first was a little taken aback when told of the comments, recently claimed that everyone has since kissed and made up … over email, we hope.

Which Brings Us To … Three Unusual Ways for Filmmakers to Direct Their Next Movie

Via Jail: While he's waiting to find out if he's getting extradited on those statutory rape charges, Roman Polanski plans to finish his latest film, The Ghost, from his prison cell in time to premiere it in February. While he cannot currently make any phone calls, Polanski will most likely communicate his directorial instructions via letters or email and other devices. Like maybe smuggling directions inside a DVD of MSNBC’s “To Catch a Predator” series.

Via Personal Website: Since Michael Bay has been using his personal website to lob half-assed attacks at Megan Fox after the actress compared him to Hitler, why not take it an extra step further and actually direct the film that way, too? I can already picture the first post:

Dear Megan,

For your first shot of the day I think we want you bending over and pouting. Good job! Now stay there for the next 57 days of shooting … and feel free to stretch if you get tired, but try to remove one layer of clothing at the same time so we don’t waste any footage.


M. Bay.

Via Twitter: With hundreds of filmmakers already spending way too much time on Twitter, what’s to prevent one of them from actually directing their next film via the social networking service famous for making Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore relevant again?

Categories: WTF, Hollywood!?
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In the movie Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, what is the name of the character played by Stephen Graham

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