Hilary Swank: A Career in Chaos

Hilary Swank: A Career in Chaos

Jan 07, 2011

You remember Hilary Swank, right? She used to be an actress who seemed to be included in the Best Actress category at the Academy Awards every year, winning the gold statue on occasion (both for Million Dollar Baby and Boys Don't Cry), and then ... nada. It's actually quite amazing to see an actress go from winning multiple Oscars to watching her latest film, The Resident, go straight to DVD.

Problem is, no one seems to care about Hilary Swank movies anymore. It's so bad that as good as she is in the films, they still don't make any money. Amelia made just $19 million, and Conviction barely scraped together $7 million. So what do you think it is?

I know what you're thinking, and it's not right to say but ... is it that she's not pretty enough? Because we all know Swank is a solid actress who really knows how to lose herself in a character, but for some reason we all just stopped caring. Do people not like looking at her? I mean, she's a pretty girl (kind of, I think), but regardless that should have nothing to do with how we choose what we see ... right?

It could also be because the girl picks the wrong movies. She followed up both her Oscars with The Core and The Black Dahlia, both of which stunk. Shove in movies like Freedom Writers, P.S. I Love You and Birds of America, and, well, now we see why her star is fading. Plus she's played enough "out there" characters that seeing her take on another one in order to boost her profile would just feel like her grasping at straws.

So where does that leave us? Nowhere, really. We're still not interested in Hilary Swank movies, and we're still not spending any money on them. My advice: Boys Don't Cry 2: Boys Actually Do Cry. Swank plays a tough chick who avenges her friend's death by hunting down the group of guys responsible and beating them (with a various amount of unique weapons) until they cry. Waddya think?

Hey it's either that, or this Million Dollar Baby is going to be known as the Two Dollar and Fifty Cents Baby.

Categories: WTF, Hollywood!?
Tags: Hilary Swank
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