Movie Buzz

The week's top movie talk. By Mike Standish

Basterds, mutants, Transformers and Scarlett in vinyl

Feb. 18, 2009

1

Inglourious Basterds
Mustachioed Basterds Back in the days of World War II, you had to have a mustache to be in charge. Witness a brutal mustache-a-mustache battle royale in the trailer. It’s Brad Pitt vs. Hitler, and only one ‘stache will walk away alive!
2

Wolverine
A Teaser by Any Other Name Alternate title for part one of the teaser trilogy: “Puberty Sucks.” Part two: “My Brother Is Sort of an A-Hole.” And the finale: “You’re Really Going to Make Me Sit Through Tonight’s American Idol to See This?”
3

Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Aye, Robot It’s a forgone conclusion that any Michael Bay movie will be skull-crushingly stupid and have wicked-awesome explosions. This trailer marks the point at which the wicked-awesomeness of the explosions makes the skull-crushing stupidity worth sitting through.
4

I Love You, Beth Cooper
I Sort of Like You, Beth Cooper The trailer is pretty decent, sort of like if Say Anything... and American Pie had a boring, watered-down baby. You can’t cast Michael Cera as every dorky high schooler, but come on – nobody thought to give McLovin’s agent a call?
5

Iron Man 2
It Worked for Underworld Scarlett Johansson might take over for Emily Blunt as Russian spy the Black Widow. They have to stay true to a movie’s source material: SJ’s gotta wear the sexy vinyl getup. It’s the right thing to do.
6

The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3
Third Time’s a Charm? One remake, I can handle. But two? This trailer ought to prompt some sort of law: every other movie ever made has to be remade before any movie gets a second remake.
7

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World
Pilgrim’s Progress Here’s Michael Cera as the titular hero. Also, isn’t the word “titular” fun to say?
8

Nightmare on Elm Street
Not So Fast Looks like Lindsay Lohan might not star in the remake after all. Man, it’s hard to get a job in this damn economy.
9

Terminator Salvation vs. 2012
Believe It or Not The sites for the “Institute for Human Continuity” and Skynet Research are like, totally viral and stuff! Eesh. Remember back in the olden days of the Internet, when they made a website for The Blair Witch Project and everyone thought it was real? The only attempt at viral movie marketing since then that hasn’t been totally stupid was for Cloverfield.
10

Stretch Armstrong
That’s a Stretch I had one of those Stretch Armstrong dolls when I was a kid. And even as a stupid six-year-old, I knew that you couldn’t possibly make a movie about a doll with stretchy limbs. Sadly, six-year-old Mike has been proven wrong.