Who's in It: Emile Hirsch, Justin Timberlake, Fernando Vargas, Vincent Kartheiser, Shawn Hatosy, Alex Solowitz, Alec Vigil, Harry Dean Stanton, Bruce Willis, Sharon Stone, Ben Foster, Olivia Wilde, Dominique Swain, Anton Yelchin
The Basics: Say what you will about parents who spank their kids, but mine did it to me, and I didn't grow up to be a murderous drug dealer who kidnaps people — like the juvenile delinquents in this movie. And it's not just a movie. It all really happened. This wannabe gangsta white boy drug dealer (Hirsch) and his crew of idiot teen thugs, most of whom seem to have been spared the rod, kidnapped a kid and murdered him. Over a little bit of money. It thinks it's a cautionary tale, but it's really just goofy, hip-hop-soundtrack-addled exploitation without the benefit of Larry Clark standing nearby to make it really seedy or gross or funny.
What's the Deal? I love kids-gone-wild movies. But when you stack this one up to Bully or Over the Edge or River's Edge, it just doesn't cut it. Although Foster, as the Jewish Nazi speed freak, impressively impersonates Crispin Glover and gnaws on most of the expensive scenery that surrounds these little rascals.
Ranking Justin Timberlake in Order of Excellence:
1. "D--- in a Box" music-video sketch on SNL.
2. The "Omelette-Ville" sketch on SNL.
3. The "Cry Me a River" video.
4. This movie.
5. Playing the gay hairdresser in the Lance Bass movie On the Line. The one where Lance falls for a girl.
6. That boy band he used to be in.
How to Save Sharon Stone From Herself: There seems to be no way to do this. She gives two performances here as the mom of the murdered boy. She starts out all skinny and tense, angry and on fire. You watch her and think, "Oh, wow, she really can act." And then comes the flash-forward part, where she's fat-suited and cackling maniacally and near drooling. And you wonder what's going on and when Basic Instinct 3 is coming out.